Orienting Myself From Disorientation
Disorientation is when you feel turned around such that you are in the same place, looking at the same things, yet asking yourself how did I get here.
Disorientation is that feeling after playing that game we all had played when we were kids. Where you spin spin spin, sometimes with a blindfold, sometimes with a head on a bat, or sometimes eyes wide open. Then you stop. You look around with arms out and see the room spinning, the earth feels like it's moving underneath, and your body is trying to balance on its feet. Everyone is laughing, you try hang on to something, you balance with your hands and feet, and sometimes even with all that might, you still fall down on your knees. Then you wait until the spinning stops, get back up, and do it all over again.
Disorientation is staring up in the ceiling after a long and restful sleep, the longest I did was a 16hr sleep. I opened my eyes, I do not recognize this room, after a few blinks, I realized I flew thousands of miles, and is 8hr ahead of where I had been. Disorientation feels like your body wants to sleep at 10am, starving at 2pm, and would not sleep a bit at midnight. I reckon my body is not in line with the what is happening around me, the night does not feel night, and the day does not feel like a day.
Disorientation is walking the same street, passing the same stores, listening to same sound, but you cannot make of the words, the characters written around, and the sound playing in the background. No one understands what you say, and you do not understand what they say, but somehow through life's game of charades, acting and sounding, you get to your destination with a smile on your face.
Disorientation is waking up from a dream, realizing it is but a dream. Or for better or worse, realizing this is all reality not a dream.
I do not recognize the surroundings I am in. I am part of it, yet I would have not predicted, planned, hoped, nor imagined it will be like this, right now. I had high hopes of stability. After all, 2025 was a climb. Lessons we all have to learn again, through it all, is that change is constant, the world is moving, people are moving, and we too are moving. Today is different than yesterday.
2025 was dizzying, and with plenty of balancing, reaching and support, I found my footing. I feel balanced as can be. Although still wobbly, as I started navigating with shaky legs and light headed. I start to orient myself to this new world. I started moving same pace as the world around me, with sheer will power, I moved, I steadied, and I am in sync with the world again.
I did not even close my eyes to dream, I watched it all unfold, yet I don’t recognize it at all.
How did I get here? I asked myself.
Solid poles, familiar faces, they all start to go. Even some of my memories are fading.
Familiarity, routine, is unraveling.
The world moved faster than I can absorb. Or was it me so absorbed in my world?
Disorientation is happening once again.
Maybe disorientation is a sign that we are either resisting or outpacing the natural movement of life.
Come to think of it, flying hundreds of miles per hour to be 8 hours ahead is unnatural.
It takes time for the world around to settle, for the mind to catch up on the change, for the body to embrace the change.
To overcome jetlag, my best hack is to be out in the sun at daytime. Absorb the sunlight as much as you can.
And when reality is blurring from the dream, hang on to the real thing. And that is you. Come back to your breath, come back to your body, and the mind will follow.
Going to a place, where alphabets do not exists, characters are but images on the street, with language you cannot speak, is unnatural.
Maybe, disorientation is a phenomenon that allows us to recognize, that we are moving, the people around us are moving, the world is moving, seasons are changing, we are elevating. It's time to look up.
To minimize car sickness, I would tell passengers to look outside. Enjoy the view of the winding road but pick a horizon to stare at. Such that even if the road is winding, and we are thrown side to side, up and down, our focus is out there, out in the horizon.
Maybe, disorientation is our body telling us to look up. Feel the journey, focus on the destination out there in the horizon. That this may be a bumpy ride, but in time, without rushing, without short-cuts, we will arrive at a perfect time.
When sailors are lost at sea, the way they orient back to where they are is to look at the stars. For the stars and the moon and the sun are the constant sign of where we are.
And even if there is no sun, no moon, there are still billions of stars.
They say some 8.3 Billion for 2026, and one of them is you.
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